speak my thoughts.
Saturday, May 05, 2007 5/05/2007 03:50:00 PM
I am superlatively relieved that the phase test is over. The distress was only momentarily before my brain woke me up again and whispered dissapointly,
it’s just the beginning. My acessor was Mr tan and he is disparate i must say. So the pit stop at bedok’s Long John was to fulfill our empty stomach. And yes Ms Huda there is Long John at Bedok. =) haa, confident takde ey.
Randoms.
I cannot stop, I need something to distract me from the preposterous ideas in my head which was created by my own paranoia. Been dividing my thoughts between school and love affairs, I don't really find them irrelevant because half the time, both of them don't turn out well. I hate the feeling of starting something which I can't finish.
People keep reminding me of my stupidity when I told them I saved the relationship. But they don't know, without something important like a relationship in my life, I am like a wall with nothing to hold it together. No, it's not what you think. I am not those girls who need a man to feel whole, I just need to feel certain that there will always be someone I can fall on just so that I won't collapse on myself when the weight of this disease increase. It's the selfish concept of a makeshift solution when happy pills don't work anymore. Then again, it's hard to love something which would only promise tragedies more that happiness.
They're only looking at my life through a telescope at some distant planet, nothing is clear and that's why they make assumptions to convince themselves that they're smart. They could be 100% right, I can't be sure but if history repeats itself, I'm afraid they're going to have a funeral to attend.
i write habitually as a way to
verbalize my far too complex thoughts which
are always in a web of words, tightly woven in fabric of sentences
that complicate life unnessarily.
