msfido
dido

predicament
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i write habitually as a way to verbalize my far too complex thoughts which are always in a web of words, tightly woven in fabric of sentences that complicate life unnessarily.


speak

listen





speak my thoughts.
Thursday, February 15, 2007 2/15/2007 10:28:00 PM
Recently,
in between the exigencies
of life beckoning my head,
I realised
that I am all alone
in the world.
Even a brief two-day gap
in activity was enough time
for that old,
ugly feeling,
the black wave
to start creeping up on me.
Since I sleep little
from Monday to Friday,
it was torturing.
I feel abandoned
by someone who claimed he loves me
and as a result,
I'm always feeling at the mercy
of something.
Even between
so much socialising
and writing,
my time still allows me
to notice my emotional state,
not in passing blinks of fatigues,
but like a hive of bees
buzzing in my head.
I still wouldn't be busy enough
to satisfy this enormous,
deleterious need
that I have to keep moving.
There will always be this flabby reminder
of self hanging over me.
Even when I sleep,
not that I sleep much,
I can still feel
my thoughts awakening
and feel depressed.